Writing Together and in Community with Beth Cregan

December 21, 2021

Welcome to Episode 6 of the Create Your Story Podcast on Writing Together and in Community.

In this episode, I’m joined by Beth Cregan of Write Away With Me – writer, writing teacher, mentor and workshop leader, and soon to be published author—and my morning co-writing buddy and collaborator for the upcoming Writing Road Trip kicking off in late January 2022.

You can listen above or via your favourite podcast app. And/or read the notes and links below. Here are the highlights and the full transcript is below.

Show Notes

In this episode, we chat about:

Co-writing together at dawn
The value of writing community
Supporting each other
Writing identity
Editing & long-haul writing journeys
Writing her soon to be published book
Collaborating on The Writing Road Trip program
And so much more!

Transcript of podcast

Introduction

Welcome to Episode 6 of the Create Your Story Podcast and it’s the 20^th of December as I record this and we’re steadily marching towards Christmas. I hope things are not too frantic for you and that you are able to find some quiet spaces in your days and time to read, write and reflect on the year that’s nearly complete and the year to come.

I’m thrilled to have my friend Beth Cregan join us for the podcast today. To introduce Beth:

Twelve years ago Beth combined her passion for creativity with her great love of writing to launch her business, ‘Write Away With Me’. Since then, she’s presented hundreds of writing workshops to inspire and encourage young writers to find their voice, develop their writing skills and connect with their inner storyteller. Her work has branched out to include presenting writing workshops for adults of all ages and stages and taking on the role of a writing mentor. She believes writing simply makes life better so in 2017, she set out on a journey to write a book to inspire teachers to develop a daily authentic writing practice in their classrooms. Soon to be published in 2022 by Hawker Brownlow Education, writing this book was a transformational experience both personally and professionally. Beth lives in Melbourne.

Beth and I have a special relationship as early morning co-writers. We’ve never met in person but for many months now as we’ve both written our books, we’ve got up to greet each other at 5:30am or 6am, connecting via Zoom and dawn writing virtually in 25-minute bursts. In between we have the most fantastic chats on writing, editing, publishing and life. Today we will be chatting writing, co-writing, editing and working collaboratively as part of our wholehearted journeys. I am so excited we can share some of the joy and insights from our early morning private chats more publicly with you today.

Beth and I are also collaborating and co-hosting a community writing program The Writing Road Trip that kicks off in late January 2022 with a free 6-day challenge on your writing identity followed by a 6 week course to shape your Writing Roadmap and then a 6 month community program. If you’d like to join us or are just interested to find out more, head to The Writing Road Trip waitlist link in the show notes on QuietWriting.com. Or you can find the link in my bio on Instagram where I am @writingquietly and of course all the links to connect us with both are in the show notes. Before we head into the podcast, warmest wishes to you for this festive and holiday season. I hope you get to send time with loved ones and curl up with a good book or two. Thank you for listening and connecting with me, Quiet Writing and the Create Your Story Podcast. It means so much to me. So now let’s head into the interview!

Transcript of interview with Beth Cregan

Terri Connellan: Hello, Beth. And welcome to the Create Your Story Podcast. And thank you so much for your support of me and my book Wholehearted, especially as morning writing buddies.

Beth Cregan: It’s a pleasure to be here and it’s a pleasure to be here in daylight hours!

Terri Connellan: Yes. We usually catch up first thing in the morning at about five thirty or six in the dark. So yeah, so it’s good to connect and we’ll talk about that more as we go through. We’ve had lots of conversations about writing, editing, publishing, and so much more on our journey together so it’s great for us to be able to share some of those conversations with people today. So can you, as a starting point fill everyone in on how you got to be, where you are, what you do and your new book.

Beth Cregan: I trained as a kindergarten and primary teacher. So that was like 35 years ago and after I’d been teaching for a few years, I had a gap year in Asia, and I wrote every day. So I’d always loved writing, but it wasn’t so much of a daily practice. And then while I was away, I had that experience of making writing really part of my life.

So I came back and taught, but when I had Molly, my first daughter, I decided that perhaps I’d like to reinvent myself a little. I wasn’t sure that I wouldn’t teach, but I wanted to do something a little bit different. So I started to study professional writing and I loved it.

I loved everything about it. I loved being a student. I loved talking about writing, but I think perhaps the biggest part of that was that I worked out you could teach someone to write. Before then I had the experience of capturing my own thoughts, but I hadn’t really discovered that I could capture images and thread them together and make stories.

And when I realised that somebody could teach me to do that, I had that understanding that I could teach somebody also to do that. So I rather than go back into the system, I taught for a company that ran programs for gifted kids and I taught writing. So I did that and various other jobs along the way.

Then finally in I think 2010, I’d had the experience of setting up a kinder and I’d worked there for three years and I loved it. But it was where everything came together because I had the experience of running a business cause a kinder is a little like a business. So suddenly the writing and the running a business and the teaching all felt like they combined and I decided to start my own business.

So that was Write Away With Me and then I started to teach classes after school. So I had a core group of kids some of who’d been in my kindergarten groups came through into my writing classes after school. So that was lovely and then I started to also go into schools and teach writing workshops.

And from there, I also started to teach professional development workshops for teachers. So those three: my private teaching, in school teaching and working with teachers became the core of my business and my writing. And so I blogged about that and wrote newsletters. And from there, that was the start of the book really.

At first, I felt that creativity was being sidelined and it was very structured and very much based on assessment and data. And I wanted kids to have a chance to be creative and to fall in love with writing. And I had those kids after school who were kids that loved writing. And I just wanted to bring that spirit into schools. So that was my start and the book has changed and it’s something a little bit different to that now, but my original intention and it’s still the intention is to re-imagine how creativity could fit into the actual structure of our program as it stands now. So I think that answers all of those things.

Terri Connellan: Fantastic. Yes. It’s a big question, but in there, I’m just seeing writing as this thread that goes all the way through your teaching, your professional development with others, your own professional writing, learning, realising you can teach writing and then, sharing your knowledge from all that in a book. So, I love beautiful body of work focused around writing and around sharing the love too in there.

Beth Cregan: And I think writing has been my solid companion as a kid, as a teenager. Recently I spoke to, the year twelves at my school and they have a journal as part of their year 12 program. And I went back under the stairs and through all my boxes and found the journals that I had in year 12. And I realized that it’s just been there all the time, not always at the forefront, but al ways there.

Terri Connellan: It’s something that I connect with too. So it’s that idea of a body of work or ingredients or passions that keep popping up, but they take different forms that I think is something we connect. So we both have a passion for writing. We both have a love for writing, and one of the ways we connect around that is writing in the morning together.

So, Beth was already doing Dawn Writing and invited me to join. So at five thirty or six o’clock, depending on the time of year, we hop up together. I live in Sydney, Beth lives in Melbourne and we work via Zoom virtually to write. It’s a great joy. isn’t it Beth?

Beth Cregan: It is and it started so organically. It was the beginning stages of lockdown 2020. And I was talking to Sandra who joins us as well, it was just a let’s jump on and sort of connect with each other. And then that night, I just thought I’m going to do this Dawn Writers idea and invite other people to come and write with me because I felt like I really needed a structure.

I was needing to move on with my book and locked down and a house full of people all working at different places and the distractions. So it had this lovely start to it, not much thought just, sort of an idea in the shower and I had no expectations for how that would look, I think.

And, how it looks now is exactly the way it was meant to be, just a very small group of people, greeting each other at dawn and giving each other courage to work on our own projects.

Terri Connellan: It’s fantastic. And it’s been such a support for me in getting my book written and published and and I know we’re going through a similar journey, and we’re able to share experiences of particularly going through those hard, sloggy times where it feels like it’s endless, cheer each other on a bit.

Beth Cregan: Absolutely. I don’t want to say, I don’t think my book would be finished now if it wasn’t for that, because who knows how I would have wrangled it into shape, but I don’t think it would have been as joyful as it’s been and I don’t mean necessarily the writing experience has been joyful, because I think we’ve had lots of conversations about that. It’s not always joyful, but I think the conversations about writing that we have are joyful.

Terri Connellan: And I think the way we do it too, which, for people listening is like a 25 minute Pomodoro type, set a timer. And so we’re co-writing, but doing our own writing. And then at the end of the twenty-five minutes, we stop and have a chat. And often that might be what’s surfaced in the morning pages or what might be the focus of our work. So all those conversations are really helpful too. I think they take away the isolation.

Beth Cregan: They take away the isolation, and they become part of your writing identity. I think over the last, probably 18 months, at least we’ve been doing it consistently now, haven’t we? I feel like some of my real aha moments and real formative moments about writing have come from those conversations because there is something about the dawn and sort of breaking open and you’re breaking open your own day.

And there is a sort of a vulnerability about that energy. And I feel like some of the biggest things I’ve learned about myself and recorded are really important, foundational, to how I think of myself, came from those conversations.

Terri Connellan: I find that too. I’ve always got a notepad here and I’m often writing down things that might be something you say, or you recommend or a podcast. And, I think it’s too the rhythm of checking in regularly, you develop ongoing dialogue perhaps.

Beth Cregan: My book is for primary teachers, ultimately, although for any teachers at work and teach writing, but one of the chapter is about writing routines and rituals. And we don’t think always in terms of that in a primary school setting, but it has been really instrumental… it’s a rhythm and a routine for me to wake up and do a series of actions and to come in to the space where it’s usually quite dark. I only have a lamp. I do things very much the same each morning. And it means that when I sit down to do that, my brain signals, this is time to… if it’s journaling, then this is time to reflect. Or if it’s writing, this is time to think things through, this is time to brainstorm ideas. So that routine and that rhythm of, same time, same place. It’s always you and I, but other people come in and out of that as well. It’s amplified for me how important, routine and ritual is to really any sort of project that you’re working on.

Terri Connellan: Absolutely. And I think it’s that idea of where practice, writing practice or practice anything, and routine come together. But routine can sound dull and boring but that idea of practice and craft showing up to the page.

Beth Cregan: It does feel like in its own way, it feels like it’s sacred. And I think we’ve talked about this recently, that it feels somehow, it’s not religious or spiritual experience, but it is the regularity of a form of worship with words really and turning up to do that, making space to do that every day or five days and the days that we give ourselves off to sleep in.

Terri Connellan: And I know we often get to the end of that, it might be an hour and a half might be an hour, whatever we choose to do and say, well, that’s great. We’ve done the important thing for the day. And I think it gives you a bit of a headstart.

Beth Cregan: It does. On the days when I don’t do it, it feels like a slippery time in terms of settling down and getting work done. I’ll find myself sort of nine 30 and then suddenly I’ll do something else and it’ll be 10. Whereas when I have that start, I do go and do something afterwards. I usually have a bit of time out, cause it’s quite focused, even if you’re doing morning pages, it’s a real focus sort of time. So I usually take my stuff away, but when I come back, I’m in that zone of ready to go. I’m not all over the place. I’m not scattered. When I don’t do it, I have that feeling of being a little bit scattered and it takes me probably an hour or more to settle into my day. Whereas I think we’ve already done that by the time we have breakfast. That’s a bonus.

Terri Connellan: Yeah, I totally relate to that. And I think it’s that accountability to each other, but accountability to the practice too, which is great. Yeah. Some people have asked us about how hard it is to get up early and write. And, I think we’ve found that it’s not so hard, the more you do it. So what would you say motivates you or makes it easy to get up?

Beth Cregan: Well we were talking recently at your launch about morning and evening. And I think I wasn’t perhaps always a morning person because I know when my kids were little, they used to go to bed quite early and I used to have the evening where I would do creative things or whatever I was doing.

But I think over the years I’ve become a bit of a morning person. So the actual getting up naturally isn’t that difficult, but in 2016, I got acquainted with Ayurveda and they have a real teaching about greeting the day and various routines that you do. So I was already in that frame of mind. So getting up wasn’t such a problem, but I do think that once you start to wake up early and you do it consistently, you do find yourself going to bed earlier. I find when I get out of the habit of it, I think over January, when we had a break, I found myself going to bed at like 1130, midnight and sleeping in.

But when you actually get in that habit, you naturally can’t last long past 9: 30, 10, and then I just have everything set up, ready to go. I’m not a crazy organized person, but I usually spend a few minutes getting my teapot ready, getting my drink bottle, ready, making sure I’ve got room to balance a computer somewhere. I have my Ayurvedic routines that I might do already in the one spot. So I find that makes it easier. Just to not be scrambling for things. So I never have that sense that I’m belting down to turn on the computer in the nick of time. I always feel like it’s a smooth transition.

Terri Connellan: What I’m hearing from you is what I’ve learned too, and also working with clients is it’s what you do the night before really helps with the morning. The morning routine starts with the evening routine. And it was funny, we only talked about it at the virtual launch, but I do the same thing. I always make sure my clothes are there. I make sure the kettle’s filled up, the cup’s there. It’s got the teabag in and I just know there’s a set number of things and in a way that’s actually lovely. It’s nice. Cause you don’t get distracted. You’re just there to do that. And I said to you, I think this morning when we were talking that if I don’t have the accountability of you being there, I might get up early, but I tend to faff around. I think it helps to focus.

Beth Cregan: Yes, it does. And I think when I don’t have somebody else there, I don’t do the twenty-five bursts in the morning. I do sometimes do that during the day by myself, but in the morning I don’t tend to do it. And I think that does sort of lead you, the 25 minutes is a really good container for pouring things out. So yeah, I’m a bit the same. If I’m by myself, I tend to go through all those steps but I don’t settle as easily, I think, because part of the routine isn’t quite there.

Terri Connellan: For sure. So tell us more about your book and where you’re up to in the writing.

Beth Cregan: Well, as of today, I had the last 800 words or so, which were the conclusion. And I don’t know if you felt like this, but I felt a bit teary today just finishing off that last 800 words, because this piece of writing, this project, has been such a companion through lockdown. And we haven’t always seen eye to eye and it’s sometimes been a bit of a love, hate relationship, but we’ve had each other’s back the whole two years or close to two years.

So it felt great to start piecing that bit of writing together but I realized that I’d left it for a while and I think it was because I just didn’t want to sign off on that container that has really held my work and my life together, cause I haven’t been able to work in schools consistently.

So I’ve just finished that and the rest of the book has just undergone the first full structural edit where you move everything around and check your arguments and all those sorts of things. So, I know you, and I always say this that, you finish one part and you go, oh, that’s that? And I finished my book and then you find that you haven’t quite finished your book. So I feel like I’ve been saying I finished for a long time. But I think the gritty writing part of it is finished or close to finished.

And the book is about the importance of developing a daily writing practice in your classroom. It has prompts and ideas and activities, whereas we tend to work on our own, generate our own, writing projects. It’s not dissimilar in a way to what we do. I think when I first started it, I saw it very much as being the way to balance standardized testing. And in the re- writing cause I’ve actually restructured the whole book from the original manuscript, I had to really try and find a way to make it doable for teachers. So it’s really about how you could do a daily writing practice in that first 15 minutes of the day or, or some time in the day. So how you could actually make sure that your kids had that opportunity to interact with writing away from obvious assessment and how they could learn to develop their own processes.

Because often in a classroom, you’re providing one way of doing things. Whereas this is very much about kids learning to appreciate their own creative processes and have the sorts of conversations that we’re having in the morning, that form writing identity that get them to think about how they interact with writing.

So I guess my goal is to have a group of people that don’t see writing as something that happens in a classroom. That they see, like we’ve discussed, writing as a thread that will run through their lives in all different ways. That would be my greatest wish for that book.

Terri Connellan: What a brilliant goal to have for your book and to bring all your body of work as a teacher and a writer to share that love.

Beth Cregan: I have a love affair with capturing ideas. I like to think. And so I think writing is a way of capturing ideas and playing with words and I do really love that. I think writing makes life better, much better. And I think we could solve a lot of problems if people not necessarily wrote at 5:30 in the morning, but had time to think on paper every day.

Terri Connellan: I totally agree. And it’s made all the difference in my life and it’s something I’ve shared about in my book too. Of my 15 wholehearted self-leadership skills for women, writing regularly, is right up there whether it’s for clarity or sorting things out. It doesn’t have to be a book.

Beth Cregan: It’s a tremendous thinking tool. I think some people do leave writing at school and they finish and they think that that’s that. But if you can write for an audience of one, you don’t have to see yourself as writing for other people. You can be a writer that just writes and thinks on paper for yourself. And I think if we could get our politicians in the habit of daily writing practice, I think we’d see some real changes in Australia.

Terri Connellan: I think we might too. It makes a huge difference. So we’ve shared the ups and downs through the long haul writing processes in working on books and we both experienced challenges in the editing phases that we’ve talked about. My journey of writing was that I found the editing so much harder than I ever thought it would be. How about you? How did you find that?

Beth Cregan: I had a slightly different experience, I think, because the book was picked up by a traditional publisher and the publishing house was taken over by another company. So when it was taken over, I was then given the feedback that the book as it stood needed to be restructured. So I basically had this manuscript that I had to come up with a different plan and then find bits of the book that fitted into all of those sort of chapters.

So it was a real puzzle for me. And I think that’s where Dawn Writers made such a difference in those early days, because it really took a lot of courage to get in and try and piece this together. So the editing, the structural edit and checking that everything’s matched and that I put the puzzle back together in the right way has been… yeah. I love words, but it’s been a slog, an absolute slog

Terri Connellan: I’ve used the word slogan because it is. And when we had a discussion, some in the morning and some in the virtual launch, other words come up like tenacity and resilience, but yes, when you going through it, it definitely feels like a slog.

Beth Cregan: And I think culturally, we expect things to move. We live in a fast world. We expect things to move quickly and everywhere around you, you do have information, ideas, like, write your book in 30 days. And there’s this expectation that writing can be done quickly if you’re productive. And if you put time and where I found that I did all of those things and it was slow.

And so you have to learn to be happy with progress in whatever way it takes. I don’t think I understood that unfortunately to the very end. I think in one of the conversations that we had in the morning, we talked about slow writing and that wasn’t that many weeks ago. And I think the penny dropped that my expectation of what I could do and what actually played out were quite different. So instead of being happy with where I was in the process and being in the moment, I was always berating myself for not being faster and not being more productive or not being this or not being that. And I think it might be easier the next time because I’ve had that experience of my expectations and the reality of being quite different. That’s a real mindset. Any long haul project, I think you have to really put your mind to it.

Terri Connellan: Absolutely. And it’s patience, that getting frustrated with yourself because it’s not finished or it’s not this, or it’s not, that can pop up quite a lot. My particular version of that is that I made it quite tricky for myself cause I wrote this huge draft and then fortunately working with Penelope Love who received it as a friend and an editor helped me with the developmental editing to realize there was two books in there. But then we had to separate them out and then it was working on the two at one time. So I certainly didn’t make it easy for myself in that.

Beth Cregan: So sort of similar in that your manuscript was a bit of a puzzle. That first manuscript was a puzzle to put together.

Terri Connellan: Absolutely. When you said puzzle, I went, yeah, that’s, that’s exactly what I experienced because what we actually did was went through and color-coded the bits that went.. We did that to the whole manuscript. Blue was the main one, pinky color was the second color. And then there was another color for things that perhaps didn’t quite go in either. It really was a puzzle.

Beth Cregan: I used to worry about this last year, and I don’t think too much about it now, but I used to think, parts of this are going to get missed. And they’re going to sort of fall off and I’m going to want them back. I don’t worry about that so much because I feel like any parts that are missed, I’ve got all the manuscripts. So they’ll be repurposed in some way, but it seemed important to me last year that I couldn’t lose any of it.

Terri Connellan: I felt that too. I have a document. I just put all the things that didn’t go anywhere else there. Yeah. Interesting. So one thing we’ve talked about on the way through was maybe doing a session of how not to write because of all the things that we’ve learned on the way through the journey. It might be nice to share with people, a few things we have learned about what not to do.

Beth Cregan: Ooh, what not to do. One of the things that is significant to my experience and perhaps it would be across genres as well is I think writing a book in the educational space has mostly a particular structure. And I didn’t understand that. I wasn’t quite aware of that. And I think perhaps if I’d have taken a step back early days and looked at what that structure might be, I perhaps wouldn’t have chosen the way that I chose to approach it.

However, the flip side of that is that I got to say it exactly how I would have said it and it has been possible to make it into a different shape. So I think rather than spend too much time worrying about it, perhaps people should jump in and know that if it’s not quite the right outline, or it’s not quite the right structure, it is possible to change, that’s the upside of it. But I feel like if I had perhaps done that, I could have saved myself a lot of time. Definitely.

And I also used an editor because I intended to self publish. I also used an editor and whilst the editor, a freelance editor, her work was fine, but I think I also needed someone who had worked in that space and who was in educational publishing. So I think that would have also, probably given me a few more clues early on that the structure might not have actually worked. So I think being a bit specific to your genre, perhaps looking at what other books in that space might look like and the structure they use and looking at who edits in that space, sort of narrows down, builds your field of expertise.

So I didn’t do that. I really sort of threw it up and did it my own way, which now I can say that it all worked out for the best, but I think I may have saved myself some time and heartache perhaps.

Terri Connellan: And as you were talking, that really resonated with my own experience – that idea of writing that very long draft and then realizing that there were two books. I had always thought about a workbook, for example, but not probably something that was a distinct, separate book that had quite a lot of content in it too. So yeah, similar learnings. Maybe it’s just part of the writing process that you create a bigger thing and you do your own way of working and then you work out what the piece wants to look like.

Beth Cregan: You could spend a lot of time and energy researching and fitting into a structure and mate, you may have to change it any way. So I think you have to start don’t you, you just have to make a start and trust that the material, if you have a strong enough connection and a strong enough will to birth it into the world, that piece of work will find its shape. I think you just have to trust that. Did you think too much about that – what you might have to do to shape it when you were writing it?

Terri Connellan: Not in the way that it happened, but I did have a strong sense of what it looks. I’ve shared on social media, the mind mapping. And I had a structure pretty early on about what I wanted it to look like. And I had that idea of being layered and spiraled, which is in there. But I think it had to evolve itself. Like you said, it had to incubate and it had to grow and I had to have life experiences to bring to it. And we’ve both read the lovely Anne Janzer’s The Writer’s Process, where she talks about it, like bread and, the idea of the dough rising, where sometimes things have to almost take on a life of their own before, when they know what to do with them.

Beth Cregan: Yes, absolutely. So I think what else would… I know we’ve had so many conversations about this and I think perhaps because I’ve just finished that last little bit of writing I’m in that optimistic space where I feel like I did everything, everything happened as it should, not necessarily that I did everything right. But everything happened to plan in some shape or form. Well, what other things have we talked about that we would do differently?

Terri Connellan: I think probably the structure is the big one that we’ve both experienced. Sounds like that’s something that you learn from experience. The next book you write will be different to the first time around or second time around. Probably some of the things we’ve talked about, the idea of that mindset around the long haul, long haul creative mindset, and just being a bit more patient.

And then the other thing too, I think, is just realizing the value of writing community andco-writing. But it took me a long time. On my journey, it’s been very much about realizing that writing is much more collaborative than I thought it was.

Beth Cregan: Yes, and I think that’s true. I did work with a mentor originally to start things off and I really liked having that comradery with somebody else. Yes, then it did feel for a long, long time like I was just left to my own devices and it’s lonely to hold faith to something that you’re not really quite sure what the outcome will be. So yeah, I think Dawn Writers always feels like an act of bravery. Community does have that sense of bravery. Doesn’t it?

Terri Connellan: Absolutely. Yeah. I think it’s realizing too, whilst we often write alone, even if we’re writing together you write alone, it’s that idea of realizing that it’s the communities or the connections. We met through a mastermind, through the Gentle Business Mastermind,, which supported me as a community. And I know supported you. So that idea of at least having somewhere where you can just say, well, this is what I’m up to. This is what I’m doing.

Beth Cregan: And we’re invested in each other’s work, you know, I think that’s what you find, that you become really interested in what you’re doing. And I’ve got to see the process unfold for you, which has been highly motivating. So yeah, the value of community and early on, the value of having that community is really important.

Terri Connellan: I wish I’d had it a bit early on in the process too. It’s been a big learning for me about, co-writing and writing community and how important it is.

So, we’re both writing teachers by background. Interestingly, I also started as an infant’s/ primary, teacher and then went into adults and then I worked in the adult literacy area. You took another path, but, I’m interested as a fellow writing teacher, how being a writing teacher helps you with your own writing?

Beth Cregan: I haven’t had afterschool classes now since the beginning of 2020, but prior to that, I would run pop up after school classes based at schools. But I also had my own group of students that followed through over years, many years, and they were my writing group really, because I would write with them. Anything that I learned at all, was interested in, I took to that group. I’m forever grateful to those parents because although I would at the beginning of the term plot out a program, but the parents were incredibly trusting of what we would achieve during that time and how it would play out.

So I had a lot of freedom. Like one time, I was reading Natalie Goldberg about walking meditation. So I decided that we would do walking meditation before we started writing. So all the things that I learnt I could bring and share in community. And although these writers were aged eight to 12 and 13, they were equally as skilled as me. So I did have that sense of meeting with another group of writers every week. But also when you’re teaching, it’s never the same. So you’re drawing on what the kids give you and you’re learning things as you go.

Once we were sharing bits of writing and talking, we ended up just talking about the power of verbs and how a verb really transported the meaning of the sentence. And it had to be quite specific. And it led me on this personal journey about verbs. So I felt like anything I learned, I brought to my classes and anything that came up at those classes became my points of curiosity. So it’s this wonderful circle of giving and taking.

I did a podcast a while ago and Ellen, who, you know, introduced me as a teacher at heart. And I thought that’s very true. I think teaching and writing have always been so important to me and it’s the teaching I learn and I never feel with teaching that it’s just something that I’m giving.

I feel even when I step into a classroom to do a workshop, I always come out knowing that I’ve discovered something new or I’ve seen something new or something has happened that keeps me company on the way home. Some student had this little piece of writing about the book of everything. And I mulled over this book of everything all the way home. So, the characters that I hear and the storylines that I get to hear just sort of play in my head on the way home.

Terri Connellan: It sounds like a wonderful dance of ideas and inspiration, imagination.

Beth Cregan: Actually that’s a beautiful image because that’s how it really does feel like, a nice sort of flow between those things.And this lovely sort of movement and choreography, some of which is planned and some of which is just moving to the music.

Terri Connellan: Yeah. Beautiful. So there’s two questions that I’m asking every guest on the Create Your Story podcast. It’s a big question, but just interested in what comes up for people. So firstly, how have you created your story of your lifetime?

Beth Cregan: I think that the beginnings of the story that I’m in now, the phase of life that I’m in now, I think part of the thread of that and perhaps part of the writing, how the writing fits into this too, is that I’m one of six kids. So four older sisters and a younger brother.

And I think when you come in at number five, some of the key archetypal roles in the family are already taken. So we already had the smart one, the super generous, the athletic, the organized. So, I never felt under pressure to do this, but I do think you try and find ways to be different and to define yourself and looking for your voice or finding your voice and being heard in that group is really important.

And I think part of what I do now with writing and what I do with teachers is about finding a voice. So I feel like find your voice has been the common thread in that story line. That’s the plot really, and it’s finding a voice through all these different mediums and elements and relationships and experiences. And I think Morning Pages, and I know that tarot is something. I had Oracle cards, but I think tarot is something that I’ve really seen and read from your book, but seeing you do, and it’s now becoming something that really inspires my intuition. So it’s not just finding your voice and speaking out, but it’s feeding and, and nurturing that inner voice, that voice of intuition.

So those tools, writing, tarot, and incubating ideas for me, gardening, all of those things are about creating something and speaking through the things that you create or the stories or whatever.

Terri Connellan: I love that thread of finding your voice in all that you do and teaching’s a way of sharing what’s important and making a difference too. So, thank you. It’s beautiful. And you’ve touched on some of these. So in Wholehearted, I talk about wholehearted self-leadership tips and we share some passions in those areas, but are there any particular top wholehearted self-leadership tips and practices, especially for women that you’d mention?

Beth Cregan: Well, I know we’ve spoken about writing, perhaps that’s probably that or some sort of daily reflection time. Perhaps for some people that’s not necessarily writing. Maybe that’s painting, maybe that’s reading, but I do think that having some time out and it doesn’t have to be long. Sometimes when we think of self care or self leadership, we imagine we need big chunks of time. And I don’t think you do need big chunks of time. I think you need to just carve out a little bit of space to hear your voice in whatever way plays out for you. Whether that’s in the garden or in the shower, wherever. Just tuning into something other than the world around you is really important to me. Perhaps it is about finding your voice, using your voice, but nurturing your voice as well.

And creativity, I think is the heart and soul of us. And I think everybody’s creative. I think some people practice creativity in different ways and their skills may be more defined in certain areas. But, we’re all creative. That is what makes us different from animals and from various other species. So I think honoring that in some way is one of the best ways that you can make your mark on the world, which is self-leadership. So whatever that is, however you decide to practice creativity and in whatever shape or form, I think those two things, taking some time to reflect and perhaps an internal response and an external response, making something, thinking about something, connecting ideas, all of those things. An internal and an external responses is a nice connection, just a way of responding, a nice response, I think to your day.

Terri Connellan: So it’s like a way of internalizing, but also bringing in like a balance thing. We know too much internal work, not externalizing can be a problem, but getting out and not taking the time to settle and integrate can be a problem too. So yeah, I think you’re right. I think it’s about that balance or of the two that makes a big difference.

Beth Cregan: And in whatever way it works for you. I think we’re spending so much time and we have so much great information at our fingertips about how people all live. And sometimes it looks like other people what they’re doing works so well and we have to try it, but, I’ll never forget when I first started yoga, I had this great teacher Rita and we were all mid pose and I’m not particularly flexible when it comes to yoga. So holding a pose for me, mid pose isn’t a fabulous way to stop. But we’re all mid pose and she stopped us and said, just out of the blue, be your own guru, stop paying so much attention to other voices and listen to your own voice. So I always have somewhere on my desk, ‘be your own guru’, because part of that internal is looking at what you already have in there.

Terri Connellan: And what the truth is for you cause we’re also different. Yeah. Beautiful. I love that. Thank you. Thank you for sharing that. So, where can people find out more about you and your book and the work online?

Beth Cregan: Well I have a website, so the website is WriteAwayWithMe.com and I’m on Instagram also @write.away.with.me which is a blend of my own writing life and my work. I do run programs and hopefully we’ll run programs again in schools once we’re up and running. But I do also run programs for kids online. So if you come to the website and you can have a look and see what’s around. I’ve had a term off, but, I’ll be heading back into doing some online classes.

Terri Connellan: Great. That’s fantastic. And you and I’ve also been hatching up some plans for something very exciting together to offer next year. So shall we chat a little bit about that? So yeah, Beth and I are joining forces to offer I think the experiences of a lot of the things we’ve talked about today. That community support, skills, teaching, coaching, skills we bring together. But also, I know you and I are both big believers in creating a space, creating a container and facilitating. So that’s something with a focus on writing.

Beth Cregan: We had our first planning session yesterday. I was all buzzy by the end of the day. So it’s nothing better than having that feeling. But we’ve talked a lot together and because I’ve had this experience, I’m really keen to explore writing identity and how we view our relationship with writing and how we can build that relationship with writing. Because I know that the experience of working on a book has changed that dynamic for me completely.

I think writing has always been there, but now writing is very much part of how I see myself and that wasn’t always the case. If someone asked me what I did, I probably never said that I was a writer. I probably chose teacher or various other labels. So I’m really keen to explore how we step into that relationship with writing and how we develop that relationship with writing, because I think that makes all the difference to how you then approach writing projects.

Terri Connellan: Absolutely. And I think that’s something we’ve both learnt as people always passionate about writing, being writing teachers, working with others, but also going through writing projects and writing longer haul projects like books. So the things we’ll be focusing on are all about identity. And in that to me is a bit around mindset, how we see ourselves, skills because there’s obviously skills involved in writing. But I think both of us are very strong on process, writing process too. And that will be a key part of what we’ll explore.

Beth Cregan: And also the conversations, that’s where the real jewels are. Don’t you think? That ability to share your experience with someone and have them say, oh, I see you, and I hear you. I know where you’re coming from. And I think that has been part of our journey together because we’ve been able to do that for each other. And we have the proof of how that works or how that has worked for us. So, yeah, I’d love to be able to offer the goodness of that to other people who want to be involved or take on a writing project of some sort.

Terri Connellan: Absolutely. And as we said earlier, I think I particularly said, but I think you’ve also mentioned, that idea that I wish I had writing community earlier in my journey. And I think that’s what we can offer too, is that idea of community, how to create community, being a community together and the support. We’ll put a link where people can express interest if they’d like to know more in the show notes. So stay tuned.

Beth Cregan: It’s being currently planned as we speak.

Terri Connellan: Yeah. But I think that’ll be a really exciting space and program for next year for us to share. So thanks again, Beth. It’s been a real joy to talk today.

Beth Cregan: My pleasure. I’ve loved it. And I feel so proud to see your book in the world is like seeing the dream of our mornings in a really tangible way, isn’t it?

Terri Connellan: Thank you. That’s really beautiful to hear. I can’t wait to see yours in the world. That’s going to be a very exciting day too.

Beth Cregan: I think there’s nothing like having other writers invested in your work because it feels incredible to have people who are not just happy for it to be out in the world, which of course everyone is, but to really have a sense of watching it grow up almost.

Terri Connellan: Yes, because it’s a real psychological journey, that whole practical and psychological journey. So for someone to go on that road with you ,on that trip, it’s very special. So thank you for being that for me.

Beth Cregan: Oh and thank you. I just marvel at the fact that one night in the shower, I had this idea and it ended up being so fruitful for both of us.

Terri Connellan: Oh, thank you. I’m glad you had that thought in the shower.

Okay. Well, thanks so much.

Beth Cregan: Pleasure.

Links to explore:

The Writing Road Trip – a community program with Beth Cregan – kicking off Jan 2022

My books and book club:

Wholehearted: Self-leadership for women in transition

Wholehearted Companion Workbook

Wholehearted Self-leadership Book Club – open for enrolment now – join us for 2022.

Free resources:

Chapter 1 of Wholehearted: Self-leadership for women in transition

https://www.quietwriting.net/wholehearted-chapter-1

Other free resources: https://www.quietwriting.com/free-resources/

My coaching:

Work with me

Personality Stories Coaching

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writingquietly/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/writingquietly

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writingquietly

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/terri-connellan/

About Beth Cregan

Beth’s website: Write Away with Me

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/write.away.with.me/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/writeawaywithme/

Books self-leadership + leadership writing

Wholehearted Self-leadership Book Club

December 8, 2021

The Wholehearted Self-leadership Book Club next gathers together to take a deep year-long read together of Wholehearted and the Companion Workbook in December 2022! So get on the waitlist so you don’t miss out! Here’s why I created it, what it is, how it works, how to access it and why you might want to.

About me and my Wholehearted books

I’m Terri Connellan – an author, creative transition coach and personality type practitioner.

I wrote two books Wholehearted: Self-leadership for women in transition and the Wholehearted Companion Workbook over 4.5 years as I went through a major life transition. Shifting from long-term government employee of 30+ years, I now enjoy a more creative life focused around writing, coaching, personality type, wellbeing and inspiring others.

My books written from the midst of transition, share the journey and the learning on the way to inspire your creative transition. The books chose me if you like because of the particular set of experiences I’ve been through and learned from that enabled me to write and share my story with heart.

I know how uncertain it seems, how lost and alone we can feel, when making major change. So I share my experiences to support you to be more wholehearted and shape the self-leadership skills to create what you desire.

Photo by Samantha Burns of the @MaianbarBeachCafe

The why of Wholehearted

The WHY of Wholehearted is to support women to develop the self-leadership skills to live more creative, wholehearted lives.

This WHY helped me to make sense and structure what was happening into something useful for myself and for others from this time of major change. And I offer this learning to you to help you shift to what is more positive to you.

If you haven’t read or bought Wholehearted yet, you can download Chapter 1 for free. This also provides an overview of the contents pages so you can see what’s in the book as a whole.

It was always my dream and desire to create support and a space for discussion about transitions people are going through based on the insights of the books. That’s why I’ve created the Wholehearted Self-leadership Book Club for a year-long read of the books together.

So why a book club to support you in transition?

So you might be asking, why a book club to support me as I contemplate or go through change?

If you are going through a major change in your life, you’ll know it can feel VERY destabilising! The transitions can be many and varied such as:

job change
retirement
redundancy
retrenchment
wanting to write a book
making space for creativity
making art more central in your life
working for yourself instead of others
tree change
sea change
moving house
becoming an author
stepping into a new phase of creativity or writing or art
kids leaving home
relationship change
leaving paid employment
learning new skills you want to shape a business or practice around

And so much more. You might not even know exactly what it is but that where you are is not where you want to be.

Navigating change can take time and leave us feeling lonely at times as we re-create a new identity. Our networks might change. We are building on the foundations of what we have already created and working with our personality strengths in new ways which is positive but takes work. It is often about how we have defined ourselves so it means looking at ourselves in new ways.

So the Wholehearted Self-leadership Book Club is a way of processing all of these experiences in a structured, supported way. Wholehearted is full of rich insights and resources! It’s the wisdom of a lifetime distilled. People are telling me they are savouring it, meandering, going down side tracks, reading other books mentioned within its pages. And that is exactly what I envisaged the reading experience to be like: something we carve out time for. It is a practical book above all; that’s why there’s an accompanying Wholehearted Companion Workbook.

About the Book Club + how to join in

So yes, it’s a book club, because book clubs are an awesome way to reflect and connect around reading. But it’s also a community/group coaching program with 90-minute monthly live calls with me as your coach asking questions to prompt growth, support you in transition and creativity, suggesting just the right resources, and guiding you to the best outcomes. Plus you get to learn from others, tap into my experiences of transition and writing the books and ask me anything you want!

We’ll work through the book and workbook one section at at time in a deep, guided read you can apply immediately in your life. So whatever change is happening (or not happening) for you, I hope you’ll join me in the book club.

This is a cost-effective way to get coaching guidance and commit to change with support and community. There is a monthly payment plan and an annual upfront one where you can save as well as 50% scholarship options for Black Indigenous Women of Colour, women with disabilities and LGBQT women and non binary people to encourage participation and equity. Apply here for to be considered for the scholarship option.

So head to the Wholehearted Self-leadership Book Club enrolment and info page to find out more and join us. And join the waitlist to be the first to know when enrolment is open for our December 2022 into 2023 start!

Wholehearted Self-leadership Book Club waitlist for Dec 2022 into 2023

I hope you will join me and the community of women that is gathering. You can DM me on social media too if you have any questions.

Want to read more?

Wholehearted: Self-leadership for women in transition

Wholehearted Companion Workbook

Wholehearted Reader Praise

Wholehearted Book Walk-through

Wholehearted Virtual Book Launch 1

Wholehearted Virtual Book Launch 2

Wholehearted Book Club Notes – generic Book Club notes, but they give you an idea of what we will cover over the year!

Books writing

Cognitive Science Writing Tips from Anne Janzer’s The Writer’s Process

August 16, 2021

You hone the craft of writing through practice; it does not arise from understanding the mind alone. But the practice is easier and more enjoyable when you approach it in a way that complements your mind’s behavior.

Anne Janzer, The Writer’s Process

My friend and writing buddy Beth Cregan recommended Anne Janzer’s The Writer’s Process, so I downloaded the audiobook and listened on my travels. I loved it! Then I bought the ebook and worked through it again closely for a presentation on personality and writing. Recently the beautiful hard copy arrived because I want this book close by to inspire me as I write and so I can read it again and again.

As it has inspired me so much, I share a few insights from the book here and encourage you to read it!

I’ve read MANY books about writing over the years. What I love about The Writer’s Process is that it looks at the cognitive aspects of writing. Drawing on research from cognitive science, Anne Janzer helps us understand how the brain works in the writer’s process. With that insight, we can work more consciously in partnership with our brain in our creative processes. We can craft our own writer’s process and actively guide our creativity in a more informed and self-aware way.

The more mysterious aspects of writing, the numinous, the inspiration, the moments when the blood flows and the writing is white hot are exciting. But that is just one part of the process to be combined with other more structural and pragmatic elements. Working in a metacognitive way with our brain through all steps of the writer’s process is a practical way to create what we desire to shape.

Here are a few key tips from The Writer’s Process – but read the book in its entirety! It’s a gift of insight from Anne Janzer to writers and creatives.

Know and use your inner gears

Janzer explains two key inner gears in the writer’s process: the Scribe and the Muse.

If you’ve worked through a long-haul writing journey, as I have with my book Wholehearted: Self-leadership for women in transition, you will know the parts that make up the writer’s process feel very different. Some steps like crafting those first creative insights are more aligned to the Muse. Other steps like editing and proofreading are more the work of the Scribe.

Getting clear on these two different perspectives and their associated writing skills has helped immensely. Here is Anne Janzer’s succinct summation:

Within each of us, the Scribe summons our verbal skills to find the right words, assembles them in grammatically correct sentences, and creates sensible structures. The Scribe manages deadlines and gets the work done.
But writer also access intuition, creativity, and empathy. These processes are the domain of the Muse.
The Writer’s Process page 17

This is something we intuitively know and, as a teacher of writing, I was aware of and taught these unique skills. But the framework of the Scribe and the Muse provides a way to move practically with awareness through the steps of the writing process. Critically, they have different kinds of attention:

SCRIBE: focused attention eg research, outlining, revision, proof-reading
MUSE: creative, wide-ranging attention, including periods of rest, incubation

When we are drafting, ideally the Muse and Scribe work together in a state of flow.

Understanding these different skill-sets and types of attention means we can harness them. We can draw on the interplay between them in our creative process. Janzer’s practical tips for leading ourselves help us negotiate through the ebb and flow of the demanding cognitive task of writing, especially when working on a longer project.

Laptop computer on a desk with an open book and pen and a cup of coffee. It looks like research is in progress.

Understand the 7 steps of the writing process

Anne Janzer provides a very useful 7 step model of the writing process using the analogy of bread-making. She aligns these writing (and baking) steps with the inner gears of the writing process.

Getting clearer on this writing process, one we often cycle back and forth through, has been incredibly useful. I like to have a map, compass or framework for anything I am doing. This overall flow of the writing process and being more cognisant of the inner gears at work has supported me as I’ve moved through writing my book:

1 Research (Scribe)

2 Let the ideas incubate (Muse)

3 Structure the piece (Scribe)

4 Write the first draft (Scribe + Muse)

5 Rest before revision (Scribe rests; Muse may choose to return)

6 Revise and proofread (Scribe leads; occasional Muse input)

7 Publish (Scribe)

It’s powerful to see the process in this way and where the Muse and Scribe fit, especially the role of incubation. We often think we are procrastinating or delaying if we are not always in forward movement with writing. Through the analogy of writing with bread-making, Janzer highlights the importance of letting ideas or drafts rest. Just as bread needs time for the ingredients to activate and integrate, so we need to allow time to reflect on what we have written.

Sometimes, we need to stop writing so more things can come to light in our life. In writing Wholehearted, there was a long period of incubation before the deeper editing process, including reaching out for support. It felt uncomfortable, but now I can see the work required it to be integrated and complete. Knowing this is part of the cognitive and creative process of writing assists us in making sense of the uncertainty and confusion as we let our work rest and ideas incubate.

Ingredients and equipment for bread-making - eggs, milk and a rolling pin alongside a fresh cut loaf of bread.

Apply cognitive science for personal writing productivity

Here are a few further insights for The Writer’s Process that helped in my personal writing productivity and process and in coaching work with others:

Managing multiple writing projects with awareness

The idea of having different cognitive processes at work and tasks has helped with my creative productivity and planning. Janzer encourages us to use the insights from the inner gears and the writing process to stagger our work. It’s challenging to work on the same type of cognitive tasks across different projects at the same time. So look at it another way!

Instead, stagger the start times so the projects are in different phases: research, drafting, incubation, revision. Create the right work environment conditions for each type of work. If you are freshest mentally in the morning, do the drafting first thing. Schedule research and revision for other parts of the day, and remember to leave unstructured time to ponder what you’re learning in the research.
The Writer’s Process page 142

This insight was gold! Now I think about how I structure and schedule my writing in terms of the phases of various writing projects and the processes involved. I’m considering how and when my brain works best and have more self-mastery by choosing the gears and timing. Having multiple writing projects on the go is demanding, but this framework helps us work with more ease and insight. Projects can influence each other. We choose what we work on depending on the project phase, processes and our personality preferences. We can work on the research for one project, the draft for another and the editing of a third, and build a writing schedule around this. Life-changing!

Reflecting on how cognitive science writing insights link with psychological type

I have also reflected on the insights from cognitive science in The Writer’s Process and the link with psychological type. I presented a session on ‘What 100 Years of Type can Teach us About Writing’ for the British Association of Psychological Type in April this year. Reviewing the field of personality and writing over the years was fascinating and yielded insights into how we go about the writer’s process in different ways as individuals. Our preferences influence how we draft, for example. Some of us would never speak to another person when we draft and work out what to write. It’s a totally introverted and internal journey. Others enjoy a conversation or brainstorming session with others to get ideas and inspiration to write.

It’s valuable to think about how we can bring together the cognitive aspects and our personal cognitive preferences to navigate and flex through the writing process. Insights from the two fields together yield practical tips to help us move through the writing process successfully, especially when we are in it for the long haul!

We might look at:

What is our natural way of writing through the writing process?
What happens when that doesn’t work or we feel blocked?
How can we use knowledge of the gears, the steps and our own preferences to more strongly lead ourselves through the writing process?
How can we get to know our unique writer’s process – that mesh of psychological preferences, process and what we desire to craft?

These reflections can lead to more productive and enjoyable creative experiences and journeys.

Writing is intensely personal. Productive writers develop strategies that suit their individual personalities and environments.
The writer’s Process, p1.

Woman writing in a notebook with a few other notebooks beside her and a cup of coffee she is drinking as she writes.

Next steps and thank you

Anne Janzer’s book and my further exploration promoted exciting insights I’m applying and sharing with others in my coaching. Join me and my friend and writing partner, Beth Cregan on The Writing Road Trip in 2022.

Join me in Personality Stories Coaching to get deeper insight into your personality preferences for creativity, writing and all aspects of life. This includes how to honour and work with your strengths and stretch into your less preferred areas to grow.

I’m grateful to Anne Janzer for so many fascinating and supportive insights about the writer’s process. It’s a valuable read with many complex cognitive science ideas clearly articulated. The frameworks are practical for writing more consciously and moving through the writer’s process with clarity.

I encourage you to read The Writer’s Process to inspire and support your writing process. And please share your insights and thoughts in the comments!

Images by others used with thanks to the creators: [ID in Alt text]

Computer and notebook – Photo by Nick Morrison on Unsplash

Bread-making – Photo by Hector Farahani on Unsplash

Woman writing – Photo by Kat Stokes on Unsplash

wholehearted stories writing

Writing the way through – a wholehearted story

September 27, 2019

In this guest post, Sally Morgan shares her experience of writing the way through cycles and seasons to a wholehearted life.

This is the 22nd guest post in our Wholehearted Stories series on Quiet Writing! I invited readers to consider submitting a guest post on their wholehearted story. You can read more here – and I’m still keen for more contributors!

Quiet Writing celebrates self-leadership in wholehearted living and writing, career and creativity. This community of voices, each of us telling our own story of what wholehearted living means, is a valuable and central part of this space. In this way, we can all feel connected on our various journeys and not feel so alone. Whilst there will always be unique differences, there are commonalities that we can all learn from and share to support each other.

I’m delighted to have Sally Morgan as a ‘Wholehearted Stories’ contributor. Sally and I met via Instagram and shared interests in creativity and writing. In this story, Sally shares how her writing practice has been a tool, process, support and safe place for stepping into wholehearted living. Read on!

Moving into writing

It’s a late-summer morning, still early, and I’m sitting on my patio writing. There’s a comforting weight to my journal, open on my lap, and my pen moves quickly across the page. I’m lost in the writing. This is how I start most days, with Morning Pages, writing at least three pages in longhand. It’s a process I’ve come to trust and value, a meditation of sorts.

It’s still cool on the patio this morning. There’s a hint of a breeze and a faint scent of the ocean. But the sky is a deep blue and the sun, when it filters through the trees, is already warm. I write it all down. The deep green of the cedars lit by early-morning sun. The rich aroma of my morning coffee. The tok-tok-tok of a raven watching me somewhere in the trees. This noticing grounds me, helps me move fully into the writing.

Reminders of cycles

It’s lush out in my backyard, still green, despite the lack of rain. The cedars and firs tower overhead, shading salal and sword ferns and an almost accidental patch of lawn. It’s a wild and unruly space, a perfect place for writing. As I write, I notice that the ferns are a deeper, duskier shade now; they’ve lost their springtime sheen and brightness. Behind them, the creamy blooms of the ocean spray bushes have dried to deep golden, dying away for another year. And now, all around me, I see descent. Dying off. The inevitability of fall. This reminder of cycles.

There was a time when I was less attuned to these subtle signs, when the weeks dropped away until suddenly the holidays were over and it was September. But my writing practice has given me a deeper sensing of the seasons. I watch for the first pale sword-fern stems poking up in spring, the clutched spirals slowly unfurling into bright green fronds. I notice as the fronds take on that darker, dustier hue as summer progresses, how the outer fronds brown and then die off into September. It’s one small way I’m more deeply attuned to the seasons and to the cyclical nature of our lives.

Being aware of seasons

As I write this, I am nearing the end of a short season of rest after a long, full season of houseguests and parties and important celebrations. I’ve become more aware of these seasons and of how I can best embrace each one. During the season of houseguests, I was able to throw myself fully into the fray, into visiting and day trips and shocking quantities of wine. I knew there would be time for rest when our company was gone. There would be time to slow down and step away, time again to drink water. When I am journalling, I am in tune with these cycles in my life, and I can give myself permission to fully embrace what is.

I’ve also come to understand that there are other, overlapping kinds of seasons. After three years of writing nearly non-stop and under deadline at work, I’m not writing much for myself at the moment. There was a time when I would have felt panicked by this, but not now. Now I recognize the bigger patterns, the pushing and then the need for rest. The immersion and the need for time away.

Writing as a safe place

I haven’t always written Morning Pages. I came first to a journalling practice more than twelve years ago, as a way to save myself. In June of that year, my father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. In September, my then-husband announced he was leaving our marriage. I had to write. I was compelled to write, and in that time period, I wrote as if my life depended on it. I hadn’t read Julia Cameron at that point, and I suspect that The Artist’s Way was not the book I needed in that season. But I knew Natalie Goldberg’s book Writing Down the Bones: Freeing the Writer Within and I followed the rules she laid out in the book: Keep your hand moving. Lose control. Go for the jugular. They were rules that served me well as my life spiralled out of control.

In that season I fell apart. I clung to my friends and to my three little boys like a woman drowning. My journals were filled with disbelief and grief and anger. But in those journals, I found a safe place to descend into despair, a place where I could immerse myself and fully experience my sadness. It was a painful and necessary period in my life. A descent and a dying.

Healing and inner wisdom

And then in late spring, I began to notice the first pale stems of healing. The slow unfurling of hope. The first tentative steps as I began putting myself back together. It was a slow process, and cyclical, one that has taken many years. In that spring, I began to see the learning I needed to take from my experience. I began to see the possibility on the other side of divorce, and to craft a new vision for myself and my little family. For the first time, I sensed freedom and felt hope. There was still much to face – the legal separation, my father’s impending death – but I was beginning to trust my strength and my resilience.

And I was beginning to trust my inner wisdom. By that point, I’d filled a number of journals, and somewhere along the way, a calm, loving voice had appeared in my writing, a voice far wiser than mine. You’re going to be okay, it told me. Your boys are going to be okay. As I wrote, I began listening for that voice, actually asking for guidance. What am I meant to be learning here? What do I need to remember as I move forward? Will I really be okay?

Writing the way through

Just about the time that I was getting back on my feet after the separation, my dad died. In many ways, this was a greater loss for me than my marriage and I expected that my journal would once again be my refuge. But I was shocked to find that I couldn’t write about my dad. I wrote about my concerns for my boys and for my mum, and about all sorts of other tangential things, but my sadness was too deep. Suddenly though, poems began flowing out of me. I’d never really written poetry before in my life, but I think that because I’d been writing so consistently, I was able to connect with an intuitive, deeply emotional part of myself in a period when there was no logical way to approach or express my grief. Again I cycled into descent, and again, I wrote my way out.

In the years since, I’ve fully committed to the practice of journalling, recognizing that it is the most effective way for me make meaning of my experience and – eventually – to grow from it. I’ve written through further heartbreak, through further challenges, and through the many transitions and seasons of my life. Journalling has also helped me to trust my writing voice enough to follow other creative urges, and I’ve continued to write poetry, as well as a couple of unpublished novels, a blog, and a self-published memoir.

Trusting in writing practice

The greatest gift of my journalling practice, though, came during a three-year period when I lost my speaking voice. During that time, I could only talk in a breathless, squeaky little whisper, making most of my daily interactions difficult if not impossible. In that frightening time, as I underwent scores of tests to figure out what was wrong with me, my journal was the place where, if I listened to my wisest self, I could write myself off the edge. It was also the place where I figured out the self-care practices and boundaries I needed in my life to prevent this from happening again. And, of course, it was the one place in my life where I could trust in my voice. Even though my speaking voice was unreliable, I could trust in my writing and in my writing practice.

Over the years, my faith in this practice has deepened to a place where beginning a new journal is a sacred act. I use the first few pages to record gentle reminders about what I need to be my healthiest self, things like stillness, solitude, and self-compassion. I also have a list of what matters most, because for me it’s easy to overcommit. Finally, I include quotes to guide me and reminders from the previous journal. In my current journal, I’ve written, I can trust in my knowing and my inner wisdom. I do not need to seek every answer outside myself.

Writing into a new season

My practice has also evolved. I no longer worry about keeping my pen moving. I write more slowly and thoughtfully, and I make time every day for gratitude and for that wise, loving voice that is always there if I listen for it. But I still write nearly every day, trusting that this practice is one of the great gifts in my life.

I’m heading into a new season now, one that will be both busy and marked by a significant transition, as my middle son embarks on a months-long overseas adventure. I know that I will have moments (maybe days) of sadness and fear and uncertainty. But I also know that I will find solace in my journal. And so, while the weather holds, I’ll find my way out to the patio, journal and coffee in hand. I’ll notice the air as it cools, listen for the first of the autumn birds, and watch for the other small markers of fall. I’ll write into the fall, through the descent into winter. I’ll write about my dark moments and the light, trusting by now that I can write my way through practically anything.

Key book companions along the way

The Light of the World: A Memoir – Elizabeth Alexander

The Artist’s Way – Julia Cameron

When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times – Pema Chodron

The Blue Hour of the Day: Selected Poems – Lorna Crozier

Eat Pray Love – Elizabeth Gilbert

Old Friend from Far Away: The Practice of Writing Memoir – Natalie Goldberg

Writing Down the Bones: Freeing the Writer Within – Natalie Goldberg

This is the Story of a Happy Marriage – Ann Patchett

Journal of a Solitude – May Sarton

Still Writing: The Pleasures and Perils of a Creative Life – Dani Shapiro

About Sally Morgan

Sally is a writer, teacher and mama. She’s on a journey to live a less driven and over-committed life, and to invite more contentment, grace and beauty into her everyday. She’s currently preoccupied with voice, purpose and slowing down.

In her forties, Sally spent a couple of years speed-dating her way through half the men in Victoria, BC. Her memoir, An Alphabet of Men: Dating My Way from Adam to Zak recounts that time in her life. Occasionally she posts to her blog, at www.trustingthejourney.ca. You can connect with Sally on Instagram

Photographs by Sally Morgan, used with permission and thanks.

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Lusciously Nurtured – a wholehearted interview with Dawne Gowrie Zetterstrom

August 20, 2019

In this interview Dawne Gowrie Zetterstrom, author of Lusciously Nurtured, shares her personal story of living with, writing with and learning from Fibromyalgia as well as her thoughts on wholehearted soulfulness.

This is the 21st guest post in our Wholehearted Stories series on Quiet Writing! I invited readers to consider submitting a guest post on their wholehearted story. You can read more here – and I’m still keen for more contributors!

Quiet Writing celebrates self-leadership in wholehearted living and writing, career and creativity. This community of voices, each of us telling our own story of what wholehearted living means, is a valuable part of this space. In this way, we can all feel connected on our various journeys and not feel so alone. Whilst there will always be unique differences, there are commonalities that we can all learn from and share to support each other.

I’m delighted to have Dawne Gowrie Zetterstrom as a ‘Wholehearted Stories’ contributor. Dawne and I connected via Instagram and we decided to shape this post as an interview. It has been thrilling to see Dawne write and publish her book ‘Lusciously Nurtured: A Personal Journey of Soulful Self-Care and Intuitive Healing Living with Fibromyalgia’. In this interview, Dawne shares her personal story of living with, writing with and learning from Fibromyalgia as well as her thoughts on wholehearted soulfulness. Read on!

Hi Dawne, thanks for joining Quiet Writing and sharing your wholehearted story via this interview.

To begin, would you like to tell readers a little about yourself:

Based on the Jung/Myers-Briggs personality indicator, I am an INFJ which means I am a bit of a complex character, deeply introverted with extroverted behaviours. I am an idealist and dreamer at heart but can be extremely organized and focused. My super-powers are empathy and intuition which makes me a highly perceptive person. However, these two qualities also work to my detriment at times, as does idealism, as you can well imagine. As a result, I like a lot of space and quiet time, and I value my freedom immensely.

I also have profound concerns for humanity and world affairs and the protection of those basic freedoms in our societies, that appear threatened today. In this body/ avatar, I am 85% South Asian in origins, having over 14 genetic strains in me from most continents, except Australia (Sorry). I was born in Trinidad & Tobago, a tropical island in the Caribbean, subsequently living in the UK for over 25 years and now in Sweden with my Swedish husband, Dan and basset hound Klara. I am essentially a creative and although I am very capable of understanding abstract theories, I enjoy representing them creatively. I am told the INFJ’s ideal city is Paris, for its culture, history, style and beauty. I certainly do love beauty and adore creating beauty on many levels in my life, but maybe I love London a little more, might have to visit Paris a couple more times.

It’s been exciting to read your beautiful new book, ‘Lusciously Nurtured: A Personal Journey of Soulful Self-Care and Intuitive Healing Living with Fibromyalgia’. You talk in your book about ‘wholehearted soulfulness’. I know wholehearted is a word that has evolved to have special meaning for you too. Can you tell us what ‘wholehearted’ and ‘wholehearted soulfulness’ mean to you and why they have been important in your healing journey?

Wholehearted for me means living from the heart/ core/ centre and vibrating my life through the heart. The Biblical representation of the word Heart is not just about feeling but the “ruling centre of the whole” or “the place from which desire springs.” (Google) When I was in my early 20s, a seminarian shared this concept with me that the heart is the seat of decision and it stuck with me. So, yes feeling but also decision and commitment to the core, which was for me, at that time living a meaningful life driven by integrity.

Wholehearted also encompasses integrity and truth which is a willingness to learn about myself and who I am in this time, space and reality. For many years my mantra was “Go in the direction of your dreams and live the life you imagine…” (Whitman) This wasn’t just about my physical life. It also encompassed the way I wished to feel and my long-held desires, of sustaining my life through life-giving work and expressing myself in a holistic way in the world. This could be summed up in the poem I wrote to myself which I explain in the book, Lusciously Nurtured:

To rear bees/ To plant trees/ To write poetry/ To be

When we talk about desires, we are referring to our ideal way of living and being. Two primary aspects of my wholehearted life were to heal myself from Fibromyalgia, by resting more and growing and eating our own food; and to write with the hope that it would become a foundation for my sustenance.

Wholehearted Soulfulness is the commitment I made with myself to follow my dream and make this life. My poem was a summation of that dream: a reality formed through co-creative action with Universal law and Spirit guidance. It has taken turns and twists, but that’s okay, we are on course.

Is wholehearted living hard? Sometimes it is because I am stubborn and may need to be reminded of a thing several times, but at other times incredibly easy, once I am not pushing and being willful. I believe there is a difference between working hard and putting in 100% effort and being willful and domineering. Striking that right balance is important to wholehearted living.

Your journey has been around recovery from burnout and living with the effects of Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Your book provides valuable information for people working through the impact of these conditions. Is it also relevant to people with other chronic illnesses or autoimmune conditions? Or even people who don’t have any illnesses of this type?

Thank you, Terri – I really do hope it provides valuable information for sufferers of Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome or CFS. However, this book can be read by any sufferer of chronic illness and autoimmune conditions because it is dealing with the relationship that you are having with your body and developing that close physical relationship into a deeper psychological and spiritual relationship with Self.

Self is Soul – now there’s a bumper sticker moment. (Ha-ha)

But self is also determined by the make-up of the brain and the environment, so we must scratch a bit deeper down to find the Self with the capital S. Yet, once you begin listening to what might be called Deep Intuition, Spirit Guidance, the Inner Word, we begin to tap into the font of knowledge. And the font can provide answers to many other forms of illness. Now, I am not saying you are going to hear voices telling you to take X medicine, but you may be led to someone who speaks a language you understand or you may be drawn to find out more about a medicine that actually works for you. So, we return to the idea of co-creation and sometimes, you may take a wrong turn and must start again, but that’s okay. Nothing is wasted. We are here to learn stuff.

For the ordinary person, I hope this book could provide a comprehensive guide to self-care, so developing an awareness of oneself and one’s needs. In addition, this book encourages such a person to compose their own self-care practice, so that, they can begin to avoid some of the pitfalls that bring many to burn-out. It can also provide an understanding, to those involved in a high-paced lifestyle. These folks may be on the brink of becoming chronically ill and this book might alert them to take stock and redirect their course. For carers, family and close friends of patients with chronic illness, I would advise this book as an aid to understanding their predicament and possibly, getting knowledgeable of many issues the sufferer cannot voice themselves.

Congratulations on writing and self-publishing your book and sharing your story. It’s not an easy task and takes commitment and showing up. What was it like writing and self-publishing ‘Lusciously Nurtured’ especially with the effects of Fibromyalgia impacting your life?

It took me four years to write and publish this book. In the last two years, I have been intensively editing and I am still editing so the paperback will be better. In addition, I have been learning about indie publishing, thus finding the best fit for me. It’s a long time, so it required patience and being patient with my body, with life and with my inner demons.

As you’ve mentioned it required commitment, so I worked on the book every day, but I had to adjust my expectations. So, every day I tried to write or do something towards the work but not every day looked the same as I battled with fatigue, pain and foggy brain. For example: writing 500 words a day was not a realistic expectation but rather, write a couple of sentences today, edit tomorrow, rest the next, read, write a page etc. So once again, co-creation with the body. Yet, you do have to be incredibly disciplined and thoughtful.

As I got better physically, of course the writing got easier, both in the physical sense of sitting for a certain number of hours, say at a computer. Also, the head got clearer, but the demons didn’t always quieten. One of the demons I discuss in the book Lusciously Nurtured, is perfectionism. Quality versus perfection is very important to the writing process. As an INFJ character with idealism and a profound sense of justice, self-judgement is not far behind and I had to remind myself, time and again, that perfection was not the intention for this book. Quality and producing my best work were top priority for me but this book was about the message. The message was aimed at helping people to have a resource for self-care and self-healing. It was meant to raise the awareness of intuition and the power of intuitive healing.

The thing that most writers easily forget is that mainstream published writing is not about perfection, it’s about marketability. Literature is about perfection and they hold this over our heads like a sword, so when authors are declined, they immediately think “I am a crap writer.” However, in today’s world, mainstream publishing is having to adapt itself to the changing demands of literature and reading in a computerized society. This is causing a rise in indie publishing and the traditional market is already changing to these demands. So, write because you have something to say, it may be important to someone. And in the act of writing, I am improving myself always and one day, one day ……. who knows (smile)? That’s how I get the beast of perfection to take a back seat.

How have you worked your strengths and weaknesses to blend and find wholeness?

A lovely question. My answer is simply, I can live with broken.

I guess, my lesson has been that wholeness is a mythology, it’s a great aspiration but a myth, nonetheless. I am partly thinking of the Japanese art of Kintsugi or Kintsukuroi (Golden Repair). In 2015 I injured my back so badly, I was in constant pain, day and night. I could not sit, walk or perform simple tasks for myself for a long time. The only thing that felt comfortable for the body was lying flat on the floor, on my back.

I had seen many health officials for treatment, but none of their advice or interventions had worked. Some even made me feel worse. Did I feel broken? Yes, I did: far from being whole or healthy. Yet, lying on that floor, I began listening to my body and allowed my body to tell me what was needed to heal. Thus, intuitive healing began. One day whilst lying there, I heard the blackbird singing so clearly it was as if her song was just for me. And in that moment, happiness pierced my heart so suddenly, I wept, because I had realised that all that was broken, or perceived as broken in my life, could not stop the joy and fulfilment that was there for me.

And nine months later, after my accident, I was pain-free.

How do I blend my strengths and weaknesses to find wholeness? I don’t believe that I have to “fix” or “create” anything in myself to be whole. It’s taken me over 50 years to reach that place. I am enough and I am “perfect” even in my brokenness: it’s part of the story.

What cultural, societal, health and ancestral issues have impacted on you feeling whole and how have you dealt with them?

You may have noticed in my description of myself I call myself an avatar. My soul has no cultural, societal, health and ancestral issues. My body does. My body has many health issues still, even though my fatigue and pain are much improved, and my viral symptoms quietened. I am now in a loving relationship with my body and I hope to continue healing as much as this life allows me and I will continue to write about it to help others. I tend to deal with things one at a time, so I look for what is calling to me the most. Right now, it’s my weight, because I am at first stage diabetes, so I am dealing with food choices and exercise programs that aid my goal, without damage to my body or dis-ease.

My cultural and societal issues affect my life from the outside in and these are issues to do with unconscious and possibly conscious prejudice in society and organisations. I am not just talking about for example racism in the publishing industry, but also sexism, ageism, gender inequality, and nationalism in our societies today. I am at odds with all of it because I see myself as a global person. I am certainly not nationalistic, but I am patriotic. I am a socialist and abhor any form of fascism. I have faced sexism and ageism in my work of education (of all places!), and I have called it out- Foul! I say in the game of life.

How do I deal with it? I accept the fact that I am at odds and I am at odds for a reason because the Universe wants to shake things up and I am a mover and a shaker. Let’s get the game on. However, I am a quiet mover and shaker, maybe I am giving too much away (laughter) but I think subversive is what I am. To be truthful and serious, the future is about change and we, (women, creatives, intuitives) must be active in that change. The way I want to be active and revolutionary is through the art of creativity and writing.

I am not saying that I don’t have my own issues with regards to racism and sexism within me. For example, as a woman of colour in the self-care business, there aren’t many of us. There is patronism and it’s very difficult to break into cliques and circles and be taken seriously. We also don’t have credibility as unconscious archetypal roles for women have become stereotyped, so I have a lot of questions. I also think the societal pressures of the 80s and 90s to spin in politics has entered the fabric of our lives and speaking out for truth becomes a rant. So, you are constantly fighting against these stereotypes and attempting to bring your authenticity into the arena. I believe it’s a process and must be lived a step at a time. Wholeness, therefore, becomes teaching, learning and negotiation.

My ancestral issues and healing are in a very personal space, now. It’s not a shadow or a secret but rather it needs to be in darkness and quiet for a while to take shape and begin to shoot. It’s something in gestation and I am excited about this.

Artwork by Trinidad & Tobago artist Brianna Mc Carthy @macabrii

You share lots of tools, tips and practices in your book. What 2 or 3 wholehearted practices would you highlight for others?

Meditation, getting quiet and silent – there is a difference there – you can quieten the body and mind. but you must also listen. Listening is very hard, so it takes practice. Every day if necessary and many times a day. This is the only way you will begin to hear your inner voice.

Physical Exercise – This can be combined with getting out in nature. Walk, run if you can, but walk in Nature. Swim, do yoga, play a sport, whatever you do try to spend some time in nature and notice things.

Keeping a Journal – Start with a gratitude journal if you haven’t kept a journal before. You are not writing War and Peace. Just empty your mind in your journal and go with the flow. If you end up becoming addicted, just keep learning and expanding your knowledge. It will begin revealing things to you.

And if you are doing all these things and you are loving yourself without apology, then you know, you know anything is possible in the game so go out and share it, be kind and help/ support someone else.

The only way to wholehearted is to know yourself and be yourself.

What’s the one message you’d like to leave with our readers to finish?

I want them to know that they are loved.

This love is closer than breath so spend quality time with yourself.

The Great Mother cares, even if everything around you feels like chaos. Out of chaos, the Universe was created with mathematical precision beyond our understanding.

Karma is one lifetime. Live your life well and be content. You are always choosing, so choose what you love the most, don’t give yourself second best.

Where can people find your book, Lusciously Nurtured and how can they connect with you?

People can connect with me via Goodreads, Instagram, Facebook or via my website.

About Dawne Gowrie Zetterstrom

Dawne Gowrie Zetterstrom is a writer, teacher, and blogger with an excellent academic background. Born in Trinidad and Tobago, she has lived in London in the UK and now in a small village in Sweden. She enjoys walking, meditation, travel and unexpected, magical moments. She loves animals and is an avid foodie. Her favourite place is sitting in her garden.

4 Things to Know about me

Earth or Water: Water

Desert island book: Too many/ The Story of Edgar Sawtelle by David Wrobrewski

Want to see 2020: The tulip fields of Holland

Favourite alcoholic drink: Vodka Martini/ Olive twist

Photographs all by/provided by Dawne Gowrie Zetterstrom, and used with permission and thanks.

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“But I’m not retired!” – thoughts on the word ‘retired’ as I create a new life

July 31, 2019

It happened again the other day. I bumped into someone I know in the street and he asked, “How’s retirement going?”

I could feel my blood begin to rise and boil. Not his fault, he doesn’t know the full story of what I am doing. I respond as I usually do with an impassioned, “But I’m not retired! I’m working from home on my new business.”

Or sometimes I say, “I’ve started a new business as a life coach and writer.” The conversation then goes further into what life coaching is and how I work globally with women on finding deeper purpose and creative self-leadership. It’s not always the easiest work to describe in these contexts.

My response to the word ‘retired‘ always surprises me though. It’s a visceral reaction to the word. I am trying to understand why I have such a strong response. Perhaps you understand and feel the same or maybe you embrace the idea of being retired. Here are my thoughts n the word ‘retired’. Love to hear yours.

The word ‘retired’

For me, the word ‘retired’ itself is not inspiring. Tired. Tired over and over again. Reinventing tired. I feel tired just hearing it.

It does not inspire me at all. It’s not a state I’ve ever aspired to.

And in some ways, I am just beginning to stretch my wings. I’m 57 and I don’t feel all that tired. Of course I get tired at times, but I feel alive and energised by this new phase of my life. It means getting back to what I have always wanted to be doing. That is writing, creating, working from home, coaching, connecting with others deeply, researching, working with ideas, having time for community and family.

Working with technology is something I love too. I love creating websites, blogging, ecourses and working with tools that help me be organised and streamlined. I write and coach via technology and it supports me to connect with others and organise my life how I want it, showing up, being productive and learning.

Lifelong learning and reading

I’m a lifelong learner from way back. I have multiple ecourses on the go at any one time. Currently I’m part of: the Teachable Creator Challenge working on creating quality online courses; the Gentle Business Mastermind; Ellie Swift’s Soulful Sequences about funnels and business flows and Susannah Conway’s The Inside Story Summer School. If I’m not learning and connecting with others through this, I feel like I’m not living.

I’ve invested in my skills over time. All these skills go into the rich melting pot of my body of work, the skills I already have to help me create new offerings and ways of working.

I love to read and usually have a fiction and a non-fiction book on the go. Reading in different ways via my Kindle, audiobooks and hard copy, I am completely lost without a book. I hardly ever leave the house without one. When I go swimming is one of the few times, because you can’t read underwater (as far as I know).

I’ve just finished Liane Moriarty’s Nine Perfect Strangers which I loved and Dawne Gowrie Zetterstrom’s Lusciously Nurtured which I’ll share more about here soon in a conversation with Dawne. I’m currently reading The Heroine’s Journey by Maureen Murdock because I know the hero’s journey does not exactly fit for women. I’m thinking and writing about this right now.

I used to be a teacher of reading to adults. Sharing my love of reading, I now help others via my blog to read for more creativity, productivity and pleasure. My two free ebooks in the Wholehearted Library here are all about reading: how books have shaped my story and a reading wisdom guide. I hope they help and inspire others.

My days are busy

So my days are busy and full in line with my passions. The word ‘retired‘ conjures up a different paradigm and one that doesn’t align. Like ‘redundancy‘ and my job being ‘deleted‘ as happened to me last year, the language feels negative implying no longer feeling of value, or having a place.

I know it can just mean no longer working outside the home, no longer being in that job of 30 plus years that I was in. When people use the word ‘retired’ in conversation, I know that’s often what they mean. But I am far from retired or retiring in the work that I do.

My days are busy with writing. Right now, I am 40% through the second self-edit of my book ‘Wholehearted: Self-leadership for Women in Transition’. I write blog posts here at Quiet Writing, guest posts for other websites and feature articles for other publications like the Beautiful You Inspired Coach Magazine and a piece in the anthology I Wrote It Anyway.

I wrote 50,000 words in one month for NaNoWriMo in 2017. I’m loving finally getting writing into the heart of my days. My heart feels full as I sit here with my Tide Pomodoro App and the sound of rain and thunder in my ears as my fingers play the keyboard like a piano. How long have I longed for this?

I’ve learnt new skills as a life coach and personality type practitioner. Training with the Beautiful You Coaching Academy and becoming a certified coach was a big step in my life transition journey. Becoming a Personality Type Practitioner was also one of my three key pillars for my transition. I have loved deepening this knowledge and sharing it with others to support transition and self-understanding.

Never too old

In my response to the word ‘retired’, there is definitely something in there about age and being old. That paradigm or life story of going to work for one employer for a long time, investing so much time in exchange for money. Then ceasing that in a delayed gratification of life and being able to do all the things you couldn’t do before. I lived in that paradigm for a long time, always waiting for the weekend or the holiday. I’m so glad to be out of it.

But I never saw the end of the journey of paid work via a job as a full stop.

I see it as a new beginning. A time to get back to the creativity I long desired, expressing myself through my writing and my work. But meaningfully, in line with my sense of purpose and desires. I want to write the novel that is in my heart, that I have cultivated in my mind, thought so much about.

I struggle with my age sometimes in creating this new life it’s true. It comes as a fleeting sense of “I wish I’d started earlier” or “How am I going to be able to get all this creative work done?” But you really are never too old to find courage and skill to empower your dreams and start working on the deeper intentions and creative work of the heart. Starting and moving step by step on whatever you desire to do or create is the best antidote for tackling these kind of thoughts.

Being less tied down

Being location independent, being able to work and write from anywhere is helpful. Not having to commute three plus hours a day as I used to, I am less tied and tired. Working from home is the greatest joy and I can be flexible about how I work each day.

I have the time to enjoy where I live instead of leaving early and coming home late as I used to. I can choose to swim three mornings a week and afterwards, connect with others over coffee. Then start working on my business, writing and coaching later in the day when I feel refreshed and grounded.

Working from home and via technology means being free in many ways. I love working from home but I aspire to be a digital nomad more. Being able to work from anywhere, combining travel, writing and self-employment is a huge plus in the new life I have created.

Aspiring and time to evolve

Part of my reaction to the word ‘retired’ is about aspirations. There’s so much I want to do in my life. I aspire to so much. It feels like the beginning of a new time when I can bring all my skills and experience to bear to write, coach, make a difference, communicate and share my learning to help others.

Retiring to me feels like a shutting down of aspiration. ‘Shy and retiring‘ is another phrase that often goes together, so a sense of blurring into the background, having less to say and do. Perhaps it involves enjoying life by relaxing, travelling and having more free time. But can we not have these generous aspects of life alongside working productively with deeper meaning and purpose, getting to the work of the heart we’ve always aspired to?

Sometimes too, especially for introverts, it takes a long time to find our voice and not be shy and retiring. The word ‘retire’ clashes for me with this time of life when I have something to say and contribute. When all my learning can be brought together into ways of providing insights for others. When I have found my voice and feel more creatively confident. Crone Confidence as my friend Diana Frajman calls it in her wisdom work in the world.

Later bloomers

I love stories of people who finally get to what they always wanted to do or who learn new skills later in life. Debra Eve has a fabulous website, Later Bloomer which reminds us that age and timelines are not definitive measures of what is possible. Sometimes it takes time, like a vintage wine or the lessons of a love that deepens over the years, to really weave together the stories and skills we have developed in our lives. It takes time to work out our purpose and meaning, what we are here for.

Being a later bloomer reflects the time it takes to mature those deep skills and passions that only we can bring together. It recognises too that we can reinvent ourselves in new ways over time.

What if a mindset of being retired means you don’t get to do that work that is so important to you? Or that someone else needs to hear?

Many ways to create

There are so many ways to work and create these days. It does not have to be a magnum opus, though it could be. Turning up on social media and sharing thoughts can be powerful work. Just the right quote or perspective honed from deep experience can turn someone else’s thinking around.

Voluntary work, pro bono work, can be a way of giving and receiving, realising in a new way what we have learned and how to apply it. Blogging can reach so many people in a powerful way as we craft our own digital space and voice in the world.

Writing that book you’ve always wanted to write and share is now easier to do with independent and self-publishing options. It’s not a vanity story any more. You can work with others in a hybrid or partnership model to get your work out into the world too. There are so many options and ways to create.

Exploring ‘retired’ and life options

So whilst for some retirement might be a worthy goal to aim for, I don’t think I’ll ever be truly retired and nor do I want to be. I want to be busy reading, writing, learning, sharing my learning, coaching, creating online courses, publishing, understanding personality type deeply, swimming, walking, connecting, travelling, enjoying life.

The life options are endless and people choose to focus in different ways. It might be spending time with the grandchildren and taking a more active role there. Sometimes there are situations that arise such as supporting aging parents which can be important work but incredibly challenging.

Through it all we search for deeper meaning and purpose and learn lessons about life as we go.

I know that creating and sustaining a new way of living has been hard work. To get to this stage in my life has taken hard inner and outer work over many years. This is another reason why I am not so keen to label my new self-created life as ‘retired’. It is all very active and intentional and about choice and self-leadership more than luck. My friend Kerstin Pilz writes of this eloquently in one of my all-time favourite blog posts: Why luck has nothing to do with a self-directed life.

**What are your thoughts on the word ‘retired’?**

I know not everyone will feel the same way I do about the word ‘retired’. Perhaps the concept of ‘retired’ carries a different meaning for you. Are you happily retired? Or is it a word you run a mile from? Is there another word you use for this time post paid employment elsewhere? I’d be interested in what that means for you. We are all different.

It might be something you long for but find it hard to reach for different reasons. Life circumstances can make it tough for us to reach our desires whatever we call them.

But let’s explore this. What does ‘retired‘ mean to you? I would so love to hear!

Are you retired and happily so?
What does the word conjure up for you?
Is it something you aspire to?
Are you someone who does not feel the word ‘retired’ fits with your view of life?
Do we need another word?
What are you aspiring to do at this time of your life?
Are you a later bloomer in some areas of your life and what does that feel like?
Do you ever feel ‘too old’ and how do you counter that thinking?

If you are interested in exploring deeper meaning and purpose in creative ways with self-leadership and a community of other women, the Sacred Creative Collective might be for you! The next round starts soon but places are limited and it’s filling up fast, so don’t delay and book a free Discovery Call here to discuss.

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Show Notes

Transcript of podcast

Introduction

Transcript of interview with Beth Cregan

Links to explore:

My books and book club:

Free resources:

My coaching:

Connect on social media

About Beth Cregan

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About me and my Wholehearted books

The why of Wholehearted

So why a book club to support you in transition?

About the Book Club + how to join in

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You hone the craft of writing through practice; it does not arise from understanding the mind alone. But the practice is easier and more enjoyable when you approach it in a way that complements your mind’s behavior.

Know and use your inner gears

Understand the 7 steps of the writing process

Apply cognitive science for personal writing productivity

Managing multiple writing projects with awareness

Reflecting on how cognitive science writing insights link with psychological type

Next steps and thank you

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Moving into writing

Reminders of cycles

Being aware of seasons

Writing as a safe place

Healing and inner wisdom

Writing the way through

Trusting in writing practice

Writing into a new season

Key book companions along the way

About Sally Morgan

Read more Wholehearted Stories

Keep in touch

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About Dawne Gowrie Zetterstrom

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Keep in touch + free Reading Wisdom Guide

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The word ‘retired’

Lifelong learning and reading

My days are busy

Never too old

Being less tied down

Aspiring and time to evolve

Later bloomers

Many ways to create

Exploring ‘retired’ and life options

What are your thoughts on the word ‘retired’?

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**What are your thoughts on the word ‘retired’?**